Archive for July, 2012

July 16, 2012

10 things that make me smile!

10.  When you take an item out of your closet and it still smells like fresh laundry.

9. The smile of my little one in the morning waking me up with a cuddle!

8. My sweet dogs face with only acceptance and love.

7.  My hubby helping me out around the house without needing to be asked.

6. Double rainbows after a storm.

5. Decorating the Christmas Tree.

4. The laughter of my little boy when  tell him a joke or show him something funny.

3. An unsuspected kiss from my hubby.

2. Catching up with my brother, sisters and mom and dad.

1.  Spending time with my family.

What makes you smile?

July 12, 2012

Struggle

I don’t know about you but I have always battled with my weight through out my life. When I was a kid I got a little chubby right before I had a massive grow spurt who left me with stretch marks on my back!  The year before my grow spurt was horrible because I was teased to no end by my friends. When I was 17 I was trying my luck with modeling ( I am 1.78cm) for a while and I became obsessive with my weight. It didn’t help that the modeling agency told me that I needed to lose about 6 kilos because I have wide hips thanks to my mothers Greek heritage.  So I went down the rabbit whole of losing these few kilos who I could not stop at 6 kg only I eventually lost 12 kilos and was down to 51 kilos. I remember my brother coming to visit us in Brasil for Christmas and he did not recognize me at the airport. He was shocked and I just dismissed his worries because I never felt more in control of my life and happy when I was that skeleton teenager. But my health started to take a toll, my meals were non-existent and when I did eat I would go to the gym and run on the treadmill, after that I would go to the dry sauna to sweat it all out. I became a vegetarian as an excuse to avoid eating at home or when I went out, so I could just nibble on some salad or carrots and say that I was doing this because I believed animals deserved better.  So it got so bad that I started fainting for no apparent reason. I was always with a cold and my period started to become less regular. My parents were scared and decided I should go to Holland for a while and stay with my father. So I did and it was the best decision I ever made, I don’t know if I was a real anorexic or it was just a spell of mental instability.  Steadily I gained back 13 kilos and that was it my body just stayed at 63 for a long time. I could eat what ever I wanted and still stay at that weight, my uni friends were always saying how lucky I was and I would just think to myself that I felt fat anyway. So when I became 25 my body just changed, my metabolism slowed and I steadily started putting on the kilos. I always had a very unhealthy relationship with food and because of my slower metabolism these bad habits didn’t help me.  When I finally got pregnant I was so happy but terrified  about my weight but I literally  forced myself not to worry and just eat what I wanted. My fear was not that I was going to get fat but that my spell with anorexia would come back and harm my baby.  Before Luke was born I was 92 kilos my heaviest and Iwas miserable.  But after he was born most of it just disappeared  and I was around 83 kilos. When I looked at photos my hubby took of me with Luke I would scream inside.  So I just decided not to weigh myself any longer and avoid photos.  So now I have no clue how heavy I am, I know that I am a size 16 Australian and that I feel fat. I really want to go on diet or to the gym but I am terrified that I would go back to that rabbit whole again. So I am stuck and feeling not very attractive.  I think I will have to just face my fears and just find the best option for me and my health, I just hope I can be strong enough!

I;m on the left making the peace sign. This was taken in 2001 I had just been in Holland for 3 years and that was the weight that I was stuck on for a long time.

From NSS christmas party holga 2006
From New Year 09

pregnant with Luke 2 months before delivery!

From First time at the beach!!!!

at the beach with Luke I just could not see this picture for that year! Now I think I look great, go figure!

This year in April! 2012

July 11, 2012

Jennie’s Flying Geese BlockTutorial

I had to share this patchwork  block tutorial that I found because it is sooo easy and sooo effective!!! I love the way she used the gray background but you could easily use white background with rainbow fabric for the flying geese or red background with different shades of turquoise for the flying geese…. the possibilities are endless!!! Just click on the image and it will take you to the tutorial. Enjoy!

July 10, 2012

Paint and Peel Window Stickers!!!

Yesterday my little boy and I sat down to make some paint and peel window stickers. It was a very messy activity juts because the paint is like a glue consistency and the red and black paint actually stains!! I made some drawings of butterflies, ladybugs, dinosaur and letters of his name as a template. Made the black outline around them and squezed the colors that he wanted in the outline, with a toothpick he spread it around. It turned out great and he loved it. We left it to dry over night and this morning he peeled them and stuck them to his bedroom window.  Great activity for a rainy day! Here are the photos of this morning.

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